Wow, 2016 really went by fast when I think about. It feels like only yesterday I was at the gym New Year’s Day thinking the usual “This year will be different.” Well, it certainly was, I can say that. But, it was by far one of the saddest years. We did have some highlights of the year but I’m pretty comfortable saying, I’m ok with 2016 being over.
So, as I sit here and reflect for a few minutes, I was thinking about what I had learned past year. Here goes…..
- Relationships are complicated. Some have ebbs and flows and that’s ok. And some just aren’t meant to be (Note: this has nothing to do with my relationship with my husband so don’t go reading into it).
- There is no right way to grieve. And memories are all you have. So talk about those that have passed often to keep those memories alive.
- Doing a joint birthday party for 2 kids is EXHAUSTING. Yet efficient.
- Don’t judge people by what you see on Facebook. I think we all know this one but to me, it’s worth repeating. This summer, shortly after my MIL had passed, it may have seemed like we were all happy and unaffected because I was posting pictures of my kids and my family smiling together. But remember, there’s always more then what you see on Facebook. Yes, we were happy and smiling but it was because my daughter had a birthday 5 days later. What could we do? We also had my dad’s birthday and the joint birthday party above that I mentioned. So, yes, we were happy and smiling and celebrating and I was posting pictures. But we were also still grieving and trying to be strong for the girls and taking comfort in being together as a family. Please know that this wasn’t easy.
- Sometimes it goes a long way to ask someone “How are you?” and be ok with getting an honest answer back. There are not always the right words to say to someone but I’ve learned that sometimes showing you care by asking how someone is and just listening to the answer and letting the person talk goes a long way in making the person feel better.
- I still love to travel. Getting away to Charleston with my husband for the few days back in May reminded me how fun it is to explore a new city and to spend time together, just the 2 of us.
- Working with a spouse is not easy. Well, this isn’t news to anyone who has done it but I’m somewhat proud of how I am working with my husband because I NEVER expected to do so in a million years. Most days we work well together but, like all relationships, we have a moments. Also, add “buying a pick up truck” to the list of things I’ve done with my husband I thought I’d never do.
- That being a stay-at-home mom doesn’t mean you aren’t acquiring new skills all the time. I contemplated getting a seasonal retail job recently and went as far as applying for the job, interviewing for it and being offered it. (I did turn it down for various reasons). It has been YEARS since I was on a job interview but I was oddly confident in what I’ve done since being a stay at home mom (including volunteering) and it made me realize – I’ve learned a lot more then even I realized in the past 8 years since my first daughter was born.
- I find the most peace, sometimes, driving in the car alone. And podcasts relax me the most.
- I still love Starbucks and shopping. Some things don’t need to change.